Yes. Literally: I, despite my best efforts, am sick. I’m pretty sure I waltzed around Thursday and Friday with a low grade fever. So after a ballin’ weekend with some of my very favorite people I am still sick. And very. Very. Tired. It’s not even the kind of sick I can justify skipping work for- I don’t know about you but growing up my mom let me stay home if I was a) throwing up or b) had a ridiculously high fever. I distinctly remember getting out of the car one morning and telling my mom that I got dizzy when I bent down cause I was sick. Her reply? ‘Don’t bend down.’. Tough love people. Tough love.
And figuratively? I am sick and tired of being injured. Today was a rough day personally for me at work. It felt like I couldn’t help with anything due to my shoulder. I hate not being able to do everything and feeling useless. I know I have to be patient. Tendons take longer than muscle to heal and my recheck is 9 days away. Don’t do anything to eff it up now! But honestly I’m still unable to do normal things. I still have daily pain. I freak out when new or different pain occurs because I’m worried it’s something else going wrong. Oh and yes, I still can’t run.
So I guess you could say I’m a bit of a mess right now. I’m usually a positive person, I swear. But sometimes I can’t put things in perspective and right now is one of those times. I miss frisbee. I miss it like you’d miss a person. I try not to think about it that often because it hurts too much. Chasing a disc down across a field, practicing throws with teammates, spirit of the game, training. And I miss mountain biking. I want to be able to bomb down hills again and master a technical section of the trail. And I don’t know when I’ll be able to do either one of those again.
Man this sucks.